I Am A Size 0

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Yep, I am a size 0, an XS size, and I weigh 98 lbs… Well, that’s how I feel. That’s how I WAS 17 years ago in high school while I was involved in Dance Team and Ju Jitsu and my metabolism was as high as I could kick. I loved my body and my body loved me!! I hung on to a lot of old clothes through the years, some still fit (the stretchy ones) and some I promised myself I would someday fit into.  Some items in my closet I am guilty of purchasing recently because (a) it was super Cute and I Had To Have It and (b) what, I AM an Extra Small! (Shopping Partner Politely Nods Head)
Well my last shopping excursion was definitely a wake up call.. or a wake up buzzer alarm. I found the most adorable blouse! What a great find, it was peach, had tiny flowers on it, cinched at the waist and it came with loops to hold a little belt. I had to get it! So my first Red Flag should have stopped the purchase: I get to the counter and mention the little belt loops. I asked if the blouse came with a belt. The salesperson quickly found 2 belts for me to try on… The ends on the first one did not even meet in the front. The quick-mannered saleslady did not hesitate to say, ‘take both,’ to spare me the potential embarrassment of trying on the second belt. I think What a Steal! I got a free belt out of the deal! (Although we all now know I will never be able to wear one of them). Well, excited to show my husband my new blouse I hurriedly head home and try it on for him… So I unzipped the entire side (which ends about 2 inches from the hem) raise my hands up to slide it on only to find out I can’t seem to get it past my shoulders! So I call in for back up, hubby kindly assists in what becomes a struggle between ‘man’ and fabric: suck it in, breath, turn, wiggle, suck it in, jump, turn… About 5 minutes later its on! Sadly realizing I couldn’t even zip the zipper past my ribcage, I easily peel it off (why is it always easier to peel off?) And I return it a week later along with my 2 free belts.
I’ll spare you the ‘Blue Dress That Ripped Before The Family Reunion’ and the ‘Bucs Shirt I Ordered Online & Swore I Would Fit Into’ stories.. because they both did not end well (and there many more).. but its time to start realizing that no matter how much I diet and exercise, I will NEVER be a size 0… Ever. So whoever wants to join my club, we can raise up our Skinny Girl Martini’s and toast to the inventor of Spanx and Trendy Tops… Cheers!

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Coupon-mania!

I’m a closet stock-piler.  For those non-couponers out there, a stock pile is a collection of supplies, so to speak, things you might need for later use.  I have other stockpiles around the house: health/beauty stockpile is in my closet, kitchen/foods in the kitchen, laundry items in the laundry room.. etc.  Portions of my stockpile are carefully placed throughout  the house.  Perhaps to put ease to the eyesore it would be if it were all in one room.

I am a couponer.  But, I don’t consider myself an Extreme Couponer.. I think I’ll call myself a Need-Based Moderately-Conrolled Couponer (the longer the name, the more guilty I sound?).. After all, who knows when I (the only female in the house) will need a new ladies razor?  But when I do, I will have about 30 to choose from along with assorted shaving foam.  And how awesome is it that while I’m dreadfully receiving my monthly visit from Aunt Flo that I can just reach into my closet for ‘napkins’ of all shapes and sizes that I have gotten for FREE?!

It all started when my cousin started couponing.. She was super-excited about the amount of free or nearly free stuff she was getting.  At that time, my family was a single-income household of four and, and being a mom of 2 football players, groceries were at least $400 a month!  So I started learning and, boy, did I get a rush!  Can I seriously pay 50 to 75% less on my groceries and household items?

My first trip took me a good 3 hours to sift through my coupons, searching for deals.  My boys with me horsing around in the background, fellow shoppers passing me in the aisle, I must have looked like I was up to no good – Totally Unprepared.  But when it came to check out, I had to blink twice when I saw my first receipt!  Now, being a couple years into it, I have a healthy stockpile consisting of no more than 6 of the necessities at a time. I’ve learned quickly that our little 2-bedroom condo would not hold 80 rolls of paper towels!

That being said, my focus this Labor Day Weekend has been on cleaning and de-cluttering.  And though I might someday need 8 rolls of fly-trap paper in the future for whatever reason, I think it’s time to start making some donations!